Discover why tying your safety to constant productivity keeps you trapped in a to-do list treadmill—and what to do instead.
She said: “I know I should stop and celebrate… I just haven’t had time.”
Then she kept going — straight into the overwhelm. The systems. The admin. The guilt around not delegating fast enough. The fear that if she slows down now, everything might slip through the cracks.
I stopped her.
Because just a few months ago, she was hoping for a $25K month.
Last month she brought in $69K.
And she hadn’t even taken a breath.
This is what came up in one of my student sessions this past week – and it’s why being in the right rooms matters.
When you’re high-functioning, your patterns can become invisible.
You’re so used to over-performing, over-delivering, overthinking — that you can’t always see when you’re doing it.
Even when the numbers say overflow, your body is still bracing.
And that’s why sometimes you need someone to reflect back what your brain has normalized.
So I want to ask you what I asked her:
Where are you still sourcing safety from doing more?
We love to tell ourselves it’s “just a season.”
That once the systems are in place or the right person is hired, then it will all settle.
But that version of safety is always one step away.
And until you pause and question it, you’ll stay stuck in the same loop.
Because if your nervous system only knows how to feel safe when you’re being productive, when you’re being excellent, when you’re being efficient — then no amount of external success will register as enough.
It’s not just exhausting.
It’s disorienting.
You forget how to be present with your own progress.
You override your own instincts in the name of staying ahead.
You replicate the hustle, just with better systems and more efficiency.
And in the midst of all the maximising and perfecting, you lose sight of why you’re doing all of this in the first place.
(This is why if you haven’t already, I highly recommend diving into the new diagnostics tool I created for you. It’ll take you just 2 minutes to answer a few questions; but on the other side of it are deep insights to help you navigate – and start shifting – some of these energetics.
I bring this into today’s newsletter because I know so many of you have your own first-hand experience of this.
This pattern where you unknowingly find yourself on a perpetual to-do-list treadmill.
Where, even in the moments where you’re seeing progress and gaining traction, you’re still hyper-vigilant about what’s next to fix – whether that’s your business or yourself.
And when we really slow it down, what’s actually driving is that, at some point, a part of you felt unsafe; and as though if you didn’t over-deliver, over-prepare or over-achieve, you’d fall behind.
That if you didn’t push, correct or become something else, you’d be left out, left behind, unsafe, poor or looked over.
It sounds dramatic when you say it out loud — but that’s how it feels in the body and how deeply wired it is.
And for a lot of us, that wiring started early.
In school.
In our families.
In environments where being good — being excellent — bought us safety.
Where hypervigilance and over-functioning became tools for managing fear, uncertainty and chaos.
And here’s the tricky part: over-functioning is a lot less visually harmful than under-functioning. In fact, we’re often praised for it.
And that’s exactly why we have no one to turn to — nobody can see the side effect that the responsibility and pressure creates.
We’re celebrated and praised for the very habits and tendencies that are harming us, which is why it can feel almost impossible to unhook from them, even when we have the awareness of what’s going on.
There’s no question that this is showing up in your business.
And it’s why the kind of life-first business you deeply desire will always elude you – despite how much you do, or the actions you take – if you don’t resource yourself to work through this.
If you only feel safe when you’re in motion, you will always find a way to keep yourself busy, under pressure and performing.
I haven’t become less ambitious as I’ve sat with these bigger questions. I’ve become more clear and convicted about what’s truly meant for me.
As you heal, you become more discerning and recognise that what you once defined as ambition was actually a coping mechanism to keep up with all of the things we’re bombarded with.
My wish is that you get to know yourself and what you want, away from all of that.
Because when you do, you don’t go for more, for more’s sake.
My number one goal is to live a well-rested, well-nourished life, and put the hours I am working towards work that I deeply believe in.
I know what kind of work I need to do to facilitate that and the income my business needs to generate to support that lifestyle.
So I’m not working to work. Or optimizing and racing, just to race.
Everything I do is designed to bring in more pleasure, joy and richness rather than towards a goal that doesn’t add anything to my quality of life.
So sit with this and see what comes up and let me know what sparks for you.
And when you’re ready, take the new the Business Archetypes Quiz — it’s a 2-minute diagnostic that reveals:
- What’s driving your current business decisions (and why it may not feel good)
- Which of the 6 core patterns you’re operating from
- Personalized next steps to shift from awareness to aligned action
No fluff. No overthinking. Just grounded insight to help you lead your business with more clarity and peace.
So many of you have already dove in and shared how uncannily accurate it’s been—how deeply seen you’ve felt, and how helpful the coaching + strategy guidance has been in making aligned shifts.
So if you haven’t yet, I don’t want you to miss out.
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Here’s some glimmers from life this past week:
